Parenting on Empty? Why Self-Care Is Essential for Parents
Are you a parent who feels like you’re always running on empty—constantly pouring into your kids, your household, and your work, only to leave yourself last on the list? You’re not alone.
Many parents silently carry the weight of exhaustion, guilt, and overwhelm, believing that sacrificing themselves is what makes them good caregivers. But as Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Reesa Morala, MA, LMFT, reminds us in this episode of Parenting Is a Work in Progress, neglecting yourself isn’t sustainable—for you or for your family.
Redefining What Self-Care Really Means
When most people hear “self-care,” they picture spa treatments, vacations, or activities that require lots of time and money. While those things can feel restorative, they aren’t always realistic in the day-to-day grind of parenting. Reesa challenges this limited view of self-care, emphasizing that real self-care is about consistency, not luxury.
True self-care is about tending to the deeper roots of stress and exhaustion—listening to what your body, mind, and spirit actually need. Sometimes that means slowing down long enough to eat a proper meal, carving out ten quiet minutes in the morning, or simply giving yourself permission to rest. These small but intentional acts don’t just boost your energy; they remind you that your needs matter, too.
Why Parents Need to Prioritize Themselves
Parents often carry an unspoken belief that their needs come second. Reesa calls this out as a cultural trap. By constantly putting themselves last, parents end up burned out, disconnected, and less able to show up for their children. Far from being selfish, prioritizing your own well-being is one of the most selfless things you can do.
Children learn not just from what parents say but from what they model. When kids see their parents consistently running on empty, they may internalize the message that self-sacrifice is the norm. But when they witness healthy boundaries, rest, and resilience, they learn that caring for yourself is part of living a balanced and thriving life.
Small Steps That Make a Big Difference
The good news is that parents don’t need to overhaul their entire lives to practice meaningful self-care. Reesa offers practical suggestions that fit into even the busiest schedules:
Micro-moments of calm. Ten minutes of journaling, a walk outside, or listening to music can shift your energy.
Boundaries with love. Saying no to unnecessary commitments frees up space for what really matters.
Community connections. Whether it’s therapy, a parent group, or supportive friendships, having others to lean on reduces the isolation of parenting.
Daily check-ins. Ask yourself, What do I need right now? even once a day. Naming your need makes it easier to meet it.
These practices might sound small, but they add up to a more grounded and present version of yourself—the version your family needs most.
Key Takeaways for Parents
Prioritize your needs without guilt. Your well-being matters as much as your child’s.
Look deeper than spa days. Lasting self-care comes from reflection and routine, not quick fixes.
Set boundaries and say no. Protecting your energy sets a healthy example for kids.
Find community. Support systems make parenting less isolating.
Use small, realistic practices. Even 10 minutes of mindful action helps.
Model resilience. When you care for yourself, you teach your children how to thrive.
A New Way Forward
This episode is a compassionate reminder that you cannot pour from an empty cup. Parenting will always bring challenges, but by reclaiming space for your own well-being, you create a ripple effect that strengthens your family.
Reesa’s message is simple but transformative: caring for yourself is caring for your family. By letting go of guilt and embracing small, intentional practices, parents can move from running on empty to building a life of balance, presence, and resilience.
If you’re in Murrieta, CA or anywhere across California, learn more about my parenting therapy intensives and parenting classes for more support.
