Rediscovering Your After Divorce Life: Renee's Journey to Resilience
In this heartfelt episode of The Real Family Eats, host Reesa welcomes Renee Jorg to share her journey through single parenting, life after divorce, and finding resilience while raising two sons. Renee opens up about the emotional challenges of navigating the after divorce side effects and the lessons she learned about putting herself first.
Navigating Life After Divorce, Single Parenting, & Carbonara
Hosted by: Reesa Morala, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.
If you’ve ever wondered how real families tackle the hard parts of parenting, especially after divorce, this episode of The Real Family Eats is for you. In our latest conversation, host Reesa welcomes her cousin, Renee Rose, for a deeply candid discussion about rediscovering yourself in the after divorce life, single parenthood, and finding strength through adversity - all while whipping up a plate of authentic spaghetti carbonara. Whether you’re seeking relatable parenting stories, practical advice for single moms, divorce survival tips, or simply craving the nostalgia of European cuisine, this episode has something for everyone.
Let’s dive into the highlights and meaningful moments from this inspiring installment.
Real Talk on After Divorce Side Effects, Parenting Struggles, and Resilience
In season two of The Real Family Eats, Reesa continues her mission to “normalize and validate” the tough, often isolating reality of raising kids, especially as a single parent. This episode features her cousin, Renee Rose, whose story spans a 10-year marriage, an emotionally complex divorce process, two decades as a single mom, and a journey of personal reinvention while raising two sons. Renee also shares her challenges and hilarious misadventures in recreating the perfect plate of spaghetti carbonara - a dish she fell in love with during a European adventure with her sister.
Life After Divorce: The Hardest Recipe Renee Ever Tried
Renee’s story resonates with so many parents: the end of a long marriage, the excruciating process of filing (and re-filing) for divorce, and the emotional journey of raising two kids as a single mother. She openly discusses the guilt, depression, family criticism, and the misbeliefs that often come with marital breakdown.
Core Topics Covered:
Why divorce can be so hard to finalize: For Renee, filing for divorce wasn’t a one-and-done decision. She started the process, couldn’t face it emotionally, let it lapse, and years later had to begin again.
Feelings of failure: Drawing parallels to her own childhood experience of family separation, Renee talks about the overwhelming sense of failure, the loss of self-worth, and the pressure to “do the right thing for the kids” even when it means staying stuck.
Trying to shield kids from pain and does it work? Renee spent years in an in-between phase, still sharing a house with her ex but “separated in everything but form.” She saw her children, especially her eldest, begin to shoulder the emotional burden—her son at 11 became protector and caregiver to his mother, losing parts of his own childhood in the process.
“Kids First is You First” - The Turning Point
One of the most powerful takeaways of the episode is the moment Renee’s sons reframed “kids first” as “you first.” During Hawaii’s mandatory “Kids First” court workshops for children of divorcing parents, her sons told her bluntly, “Mom, if you’re okay, we’ll be okay.” That single line became a mantra for Renee as she rebuilt her life—going back to school, working full-time, eventually earning her doctorate, and buying two homes.
She recognized that her own healing and wellbeing was the foundation for her sons’ stability and happiness. By investing in herself, she set an example of resilience, empowerment, and hope for her kids.
Real Parenting After Divorce: Messy, Emotional, and Worth It
Renee offers a rare look behind the “rainbows and sunshine” version of family life so often posted on social media. She faces loneliness, internal and external criticism (“If you go through with this, you’ll destroy your family”), and the fear of financial insecurity. Yet, by sharing her journey, she hopes other parents facing similar struggles will feel less alone and less afraid.
Insights and Advice for Other Single Parents:
Let go of perfection and the myth of “failure.” Even when family and friends pile on guilt or blame, real healing comes from acknowledging your truth and doing what’s healthy for you and your kids.
Invest in yourself. Renee’s academic and career achievements weren’t just for career advancement. They were pivotal for her personal healing and for modeling resilience to her sons.
Normalize big feelings. Both Reesa and Renee admit that parenting, especially alone, can bring you to tears (sometimes “ten times more” than before kids!). It’s okay to feel it all.
The importance of support wherever you find it. Family may not always understand, so seek help, connect with support groups, and find strength in your friendships or your children’s encouragement.
Adult Children and the Next Chapter
Now Renee’s sons are grown, one is 30, the other 26, and navigating adulthood on their own terms. She acknowledges the challenge of letting go, allowing them to learn from their own mistakes, and hoping the foundation she built will serve them well. Renee’s journey is still ongoing: growing, learning new skills (she’s now an avid tennis player!), and always striving to provide a safe haven for her boys as they build independent lives.
Key Takeaways
Healing after divorce is a process, not a destination.
You’re not failing your kids by leaving a broken marriage—your wellbeing is vital to theirs.
Resilience is built through small wins and constant reinvention, not from “getting it right” the first time.
Letting go can be hard, but adult children need space to forge their own paths.
Comfort food (like carbonara!) may not always turn out perfect, but it’s worth trying … and trying again.
Support, validation, and honest conversation are lifesavers for parents in hard times.
The Recipe: Why Spaghetti Carbonara Matters
Renee’s choice of spaghetti carbonara is more than just a comfort food craving. It represents the memories she and her sister created while traveling through Europe - always ordering carbonara, always comparing notes from tiny eateries in Italy to cafes in France. Back in the U.S., she struggled to find a restaurant version that evoked the same feelings, always finding American carbonara too “creamy.” So she decided to try making it herself, resulting in one epic kitchen fail (even her dog refused it!), but it’s a process she’s keen to try again.
A Quick Overview of Renee’s Carbonara Method:
Use quality ingredients: real Parmigiano cheese, eggs, and preferably pancetta (or thick-cut bacon as a substitute).
Cook spaghetti until al dente, then mix it while hot with beaten eggs, pepper, and cheese to form a creamy (but not wet) sauce, no heavy cream involved!
The dish should be dry and flavorful, not runny or overly sauced.
The recipe becomes a metaphor for all of Renee’s efforts to ‘recreate’ comfort and authenticity in her life after major upheaval - never quite perfect, but worth trying again.
Find the full recipe here, courtesy of Easy Week Night.
Finding Resilience After Divorce Tips
If you’re a single mom, struggling parent, or anyone feeling isolated by life’s twists and turns, let Renee’s story remind you: you are not alone. And, as she learned from her sons, your healing is the most powerful gift you can give to your family.
Tune in to the full episode for a behind-the-scenes look at real family life, a practical (and very forgiving!) carbonara recipe, and a heartfelt conversation about surviving and thriving after divorce.
Let us know your thoughts or your own kitchen fails. If you found this post helpful, please share it with another parent who might need confirmation that they’re not alone on this journey.
If you are a parent ready to share your real-life parenting struggle and dish up a recipe with Reesa, apply here!
